Thursday, June 18, 2009

I Dislike You! I Really Dislike You!*

*A twist on the 1985 Oscar acceptance speech by Sally Field, Best Actress for "Places in the Heart," after having won in 1980 for "Norma Rae": "I haven't had an orthodox career, and I've wanted more than anything to have your respect. The first time I didn't feel it, but this time I feel it, and I can't deny the fact that you like me, right now, you like me!" But usually it's misquoted as "You like me! You really like me!"


Leo sent me 8 tips for liking someone better (or disliking that person less) this morning. It was his way of helping me deal with some stuff at the office this week. And by "stuff", I mean:

There are 2 "consultants" at the office working on this project (the project that got in the way of my Master Plan to study for the June LSAT. My husband's unemployment got in the way, too, sort of, but anyway...).

Yesterday I was terrifically frustrated with one of the consultants in particular, and of course, Work Husband was there to add to the misery. (And no, I'm not talking about the kind of frustration that we all crave once in a while, the kind that makes you rub up against doorknobs or sit on top of a washing machine during the spin cycle. I'm talking you-are-really-pissing-me-off frustrated. And "Work Husband" is just not capturing the essence of our relationship. It's more like how you would feel about an ex-husband. Does Work Ex-Husband make sense? 'cause that's what he is.)

I was so annoyed/frustrated/angry by the time I got home, that I kvetched mightily about it to Leo, who just really doesn't want to hear much beyond the first 300 words.

Still, trying to be supportive, he sent me the article. What I liked most, though, were the comments.

You'll see that several commenters disagree with the author's advice. I love them for that.

Here are two of my favorite responses:

"I prefer to not like them. If I try to like them, then I'm stuck tolerating their obnoxious behavior. I'd rather not :)"

"This has to be the dumbest article I have read in such a long time. Why isn't it OK to dislike someone... We don't have to like everyone!"

This is why Trannyhead's weekly rants are so popular, I presume. Because it feels good to vent, and it feels good to know that I'm not the only person sipping a strawful of screw-you cider.


blognut said...

I will totally back you in not liking someone if you don't want to like them. You just don't have to!

Plus, I happen to like screw-you cider.

Random Real Estate said...

I think not liking someone is more than okay, it is required. If we liked everyone there where would rivalry and competition and the occasional evil plot go? If all else fails, kick him in the shins while wearing pointy will make you feel better :)

A Lawyer Mom's Musings said...

If you can intensely dislike someone without it draining your energy, by all means have at it.

And venting helps too, so vent away.

Hyphen Mama said...

I say, if they annoy you... you aren't required to like them! If you want a paycheck, you might have to learn to deal with them... but you never have to LIKE them. The suggestions in the article make my skin crawl. Spend MORE time with them? YUCK.

Dagny said...

I know this is not the main point of your post, but thought I would chime in anyway....I would not stress too much about studying for the LSAT. As you probably already know, the test is more about how you think, not necessarily about what you know. I studied for it while working full time as well. I would just focus on doing the practice tests once a week, and then focus on the areas you don'perform well in (for me, that was the games section). I sucked at the games section, so I bought a book of hard games problems and worked on them in my spare time. It helped a ton...