Thursday, April 16, 2009

Ever Feel Like Scarecrow from Wizard of Oz?

Scarecrow: "First they took my legs off and they threw them over there! Then they took my chest out and they threw it over there!"

Tinman: "Well, that's you all over! "

I've been blogging a lot lately, but you'll not find much of it here. On my blog! (Doh!) Rather, I'm leaving pieces of myself at other people's houses, er, blogs.

See? I don't just leave my shoes under the coffee table, I leave blog-bits all over the web.

.....................Messy, messy. Don't get stressy.
.....................Just clean up and be impressy.

So, here are some discussions I've been having with myself, on other people's blogs.

Church at Easter: We don't really attend church very often, although I insisted that all 3 of us go last Sunday to sit there with Grandma and Grandpa. Why? Because I'm scared, that's why. I'm scared about Q being uneducated and possibly socially disadvantaged by her lack of church exposure. So, for any of you non-church-attending parents reading here today, how do you handle your kid's lack of religiosity? I had a boyfriend once who got beat up on the playground as a kid because he didn't believe in God. Now, I doubt it'll come to blows for Q, but I am concerned about stigmatism (HA!). Q-The-Unsaved or whatnot. How have your kids dealt with this issue? How has it manifested itself in their lives? Do they sneak out on Sunday morning without your permission and secretly attend youth group meetings? Do you catch them singing hymns in the shower that they learned from kids at school? Have you noticed a certain sneer when they say Darwin's name? Are they hiding bible verses under their mattress?

Pleasure In The Rearview Mirror: Is there such a thing as a Good Boss? Should we view each bad boss we have as a learning opportunity, as something we get to move away from eventually so that later we can be glad we're not still at that job with that sucky boss even though the one we have now also sucks but in a totally different way? Besides your boss's suckiness, and my horrible Work Husband, is there anything else you can only appreciate now because it'll be nice to see it go when you leave?


Mama Dawg said...

For the church issue.....I'm not religious. At all. I believe in God but I don't believe in organized religion.

That being said, I want my daughter to attend a church for several reasons.

1. It helps emphasize the morals and values I'm trying to teach her in a basic way. The lessons she learns in Sunday school at this stage only emphasize the goodness I want to instill in her.

2. It's a great community we live in and most of the kids around our area attend church. This is the part where I want her to fit in.

3. I want her to learn about religion so that when she grows up she can make an informed decision about what she wants to believe in.

So, since she's so young, I attend Sunday services with her for now. When she gets older, I'll ease away and just let her go.

That's the best I can do for her at this stage.

gudnuff said...

Yep, ditto, ditto, ditto, ditto. In fact, last week at the end of Easter service, I asked the choir director and Q at the same time if Q could join the children's choir and so now she's going to be singing in the children's choir there, at my parents' church, and only her grandparents are actual MEMBERS of that church and Q has not even been baptised so I don't know what kind of trouble I'm getting us all into but nevertheless, I'm going to walk her down that road, for all the same reasons you have outlined. Thanks, Mama Dawg! Your comment has made me feel not so out-of-touch/coo-coo-for-cocoa-puffs. Whew!

A Lawyer Mom's Musings said...

Gudnuff, we haven't had the secular vs. church crisis yet . . . but when it comes, I'll be sure to let you know.

Re bosses, hmm. I had a really bad one years ago and boldly stood up to him because I was too young to have any fear. Amazingly, he turned out to be a cardboard bully and immediately folded. Which may give you some food for thought . . .?

Cee said...

I grew up VERY Catholic. Then I went to a liveral arts school and took a bunch of other religious courses - like hinduism and islam. I felt such a connection to those other religions as well as Catholicism. I truly believe now that many religions are different paths to the same end. I feel guilty not taking Jacob to church because I don't even know what I believe. Thankfully, my mom is super Catholic still and she fills in where I lack in exposing Jacob to religion.

BUT if he starts telling me that I am listening to "devil's music" I might have to pull in the reins :)

Burgh Baby said...

I'm still trying to figure out the whole church thing, too. Right now Alexis thinks church is this really fun place where the princesses live and where you get to eat all the M&Ms you want (that would be all my MIL's fault). How do you explain to a kid that some of what you hear is right, some is maybe not so right, and blah blah blah? ARGH!

Hyphen Mama said...

*Hyphen trying really hard not to hijack your comments*

See, I have REALLY REALLY strong opinions of Church and organized religion. I also have REALLY REALLY strong beliefs about God, etc. Unfortunately, there are only 1 or 2 churches around here that teach the same things I believe, so none of us attend church because it's not on the top of my priorities.

When I was little, my mom was a Sunday school teacher and we were at Sunday school every Sunday. My mom finally came to a point where she admitted that she felt closer to God while sitting on the side of a mountain, than in a church full of people who were mean and rude the other 6 days a week.

Wynnie's first year of preschool was at a church a few blocks from our house and I loved the school. I could NOT stand the other parents and wanted to beat many of them into the ground with my fists. =) She learned all kinds of things I was having a hard time conveying to her about praying and singing and thanking God, etc. She had a good time.

We also live in Colorado which tends to be progressively non-organized religion (*cough Boulder *cough). I have huge doubts that my kids will ever have to go up against somebody for not attending church. If my kids want to go to church, I'll be the first one to drive them. I want my kids to know all about any religion they want to know about, but not feel stifled by dogma.

Christie-A Work In Progress said...

I have an entire soapbox dedicated to how I feel about organized religion but I will save it for another time. What I will say is begins at home. I basically came into my own spirituality as an adult due to lack of clarity and conflicting parental views as a kid.

As for the job thing...I believe everything happens for a reason...good and bad...and people come into your life for a reason (even if they make you miserable) and you are meant to learn something. Maybe you can find the lessons amidst the chaos. (okay, going to stop being all coachy now).

Oh and to answer your scarecrow question...every damned day!

dgm said...

I was raised Catholic (my mom is an ex-nun) but am not at all a member of an organized religion, and neither is my hubby. Our daughter went to elementary school at a Lutheran school and I was totally fine with her being exposed to religious ideas. We'd talk about them at home but given her personality and temperament, I doubt she will ever be a religious person.

I happen to believe that some people are just wired to be more amenable to religious belief and some aren't, and it doesn't much matter what the parents "teach" them because they are going to find their own path as adults anyway. Between my two kids, my son seems most inclined to be a believer, but who knows.

We talk to both kids about different religions and what people believe, but we don't sell any particular idea as "the truth." I distinctly remember as a kid asking my mom how, if people of different faiths have different beliefs, how do we know who is right. Her reply? "We are." That pretty much did me in.

Most of my kids' friends go to church, but it's never been an issue for them to say that they don't or to feel left out because they don't. I think you can raise a child with very strong moral and ethical leanings even without religious beliefs.

Mama Dawg said...

Oh, we're not baptized (bathtized as my daughter used to call it) either. She has no interest in it and neither do I. God and I are okay. I don't feel I'll go to hell for not being dipped in a bathtub in front of a bunch of people I don't know. My relationship with God is private and personal and not to be shared with the public at large (except for here, obviously).

Just keep on doing what you're doing. It seems to work for y'all.